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60 Seconds with Jack Whitehall

What are these stand-up gigs about?

It’s the last leg of my tour before I put it to bed. I’m recording a Netflix special at Hammersmith Apollo. It’s one of my favourite venues. I’ve never had a bad gig there but I don’t want to tempt fate.

Are you fed up with the show yet?

I’ve done 50 dates. I’ve tweaked it a bit and now it’s a very honed version. I’ve changed it a bit for Netflix as it’s an international audience so I don’t want to rely too much on punchlines about Greggs bakers. But when I’ve performed in other places around the world, it’s amazing what travels.

Such as?

Material about my dad. He’s a quintessentially British character. He’s an angry old Tory but, weirdly, people in Belgium still find this ranting and raving Spectator reader quite amusing. I guess Brexit put his type of person on the map internationally.

You talk about Robert Pattinson again in your show. Is he your arch-enemy?

I made jokes about him in my older shows. I decided to leave the poor guy alone but then I auditioned for a film he was in, which I messed up, which gave me some good material. But that’s it now. I won’t talk about him again. He doesn’t deserve it. My rabid jealousy is totally uncalled for.

Child’s play: Jack with Freddie Flintoff and Jamie Redknapp

What’s the worst stand-up gig you’ve done?

Any gig you do where you don’t have a microphone is problematic. You don’t have any status. You go from being a comedian to being a shouting madman in a pub. I did a few of them in the early days. It just encourages huge apathy from the audience, which is the worst thing that can happen.

On A League Of Their Own, Jamie Redknapp sent rude texts from your phone to Princess Eugenie and Orlando Bloom. How do you have their numbers?

I met Orlando at an awards ceremony. Every number in my phone for anyone he’d be interested in texting is under a fake name now. He’s like a ninja. He’ll sneak into my dressing room and send people horrifically embarrassing texts. It’s a nightmare.

Does he do it all the time or just when the cameras are on?

He does it all the time. Filming that show is like being on a stag do. I can’t leave my phone out or fall asleep. Jamie and Freddie Flintoff are like children — but I am as well.

Who else has he done it to?

He sent James Blunt a load of lyrics but he didn’t reply. I often don’t know who he’s done it to because he deletes them after he’s sent them. My phone is like Fort Knox now — I’ve got an 18-digit passcode and an iris scan.

Bonding: Jack with his dad

What did he send to Princess Eugenie?

You wouldn’t be allowed to print it. It was quite naughty but she’s got a good sense of humour. She’s friends with my sister. We all went to school together.

Do you get invited to fancy royal parties?

No. I just go to the Royal Variety Performance. I quite enjoy them but it’s high pressure. I’m always tempted to say something inappropriate that will get me into trouble. I met Barry Chuckle at one of them. I was so excited. I got a photo with him and it made my night.

Are the Chuckle Brothers your main comedy inspiration?

That’s what my mum tells everyone. The Chuckle Brothers are great but I did stop watching them at a certain age and started watching Peter Cook and Dudley Moore and Bill Hicks. It wasn’t just the Chuckle Brothers but that’s what my mum seems to think.

You’ve got a Netflix travel show with your dad coming up. Was it a bonding experience?

We went to Vietnam, Cambodia and Thailand. He got a henna tattoo and we went to a full-moon party. All the gap-year tropes. We did bond. I got him drinking beer, which he’s never drunk before. He came to the first show on this tour and sat next to a reviewer. It was a nice review but it said my dad sat in stony silence throughout. I asked why he didn’t laugh. He said, ‘I was inwardly laughing’. I’ve got no time for inward laughter. He’s always got a face like he’s let out a wet fart. He’s banned in future.

Jack Whitehall is at Hammersmith Apollo from July 20 to 22. For tickets, visit jackwhitehall.com